How To Approach Women At Nightclubs
The nightclub is a strange environment. Go to one, and you'll see women engaging in one of the greatest mysteries of all time - Dressing up sexy to get attention for men, then acting annoyed when men actually give them attention. So how do you overcome this obstacle? With some strategy and tactics. Let me share with you some of my favorites. They have become my favorites based one criteria – the results the bring.
Nightclub strategy one: I'm not them
Put yourself in a beautiful woman's high heels. You're at a nightclub. How many times will you get approached? Once, twice? Hardly. Try ten times... or even more.
As a man who “gets it”, this is actually to your advantage. Why? Because most guys are dumb, drunk and totally clueless when it comes to creating attraction.
Say to yourself right now... “I'm not them!”
Who are “them”? The men who offer to buy women drinks, kiss up to them in nightclubs and use lame pickup lines. All these actions accomplish one thing... loss of power. You don't want to communicate to a woman that you aren't in control of yourself and out of your element.
You need to have this mind state - you are comfortable in your own reality, and nothing she can do will disrupt that comfort. Remember, there will be resistance when you approach a woman. It's part of the nightclub ritual. She's testing you. Are you in control of your own reality, or will you give up your power at the first sign of trouble? And in a nightclub, it's even more specific. Can you keep up a conversation with a woman that isn't exactly easygoing and friendly?
There's two kinds of resistance. One kind if from the “rude woman” and it's very real. Too tough a nut to crack in one setting. If you approach women regularly, you will run into her kind once in a while. Don't take in personal. Move on.
The other kind of resistance is “give me an excuse to be friendly to you” resistance. If you are picking up on this vibe, press on my friend. She has given you the first indicator that she is interested in you.
Here's two ways to keep the conversation flowing. Charm and routine. My definition of charm is teasing a woman in a way that makes her laugh. It communicates that you are both confident and fun to be around. This is a great formula for producing attraction, and it's a great way to avoid the “friendship zone”.
Routine is a category for things like palmistry, handwriting analysis, magic, and astrology. Read books on any of these if you want to learn a few routines to make interesting conversation.
After creating conversation and passing her resistance test, you have two options. Stay and try to close the deal, or get her contact information and leave. Nightclubs are a tricky environment with lots of distractions such as drunk, dumb guys and her group of protective (and jealous) friends. You must be very skilled in “attraction conversation” to keep the flow going.
If you're not experienced with this yet I suggest you get her number and follow up later on your own terms. There are less chances to make errors this way.
Before this article gets too long, I'll give you a quick summary one other great technique for beginners. It's called the “buddy system”, and is designed specifically for nightclubs. Get a friend to “scout” for you, and do the same for him. Have him approach a woman you like and say, “Hey there. You know something? I think my friend would really like you. He's...” and then have him talk you up.
Soon you show up and are introduced. This technique throws a woman off balance, because her radar is programmed only for direct approaches. This makes the initial conversation with her a lot more easier.
In the end remember... it's just a woman at a nightclub. It doesn't matter if she likes you or not. Just talk to her. She expects you to. Practice communicating that you are comfortable in your own reality, and that you are different than every other drunk and dumb guy that approaches her.
Do this and you'll wonder why you ever thought it was hard to meet women at nightclubs.
Kurt Dight has created a free 5 day mini course on "how to seduce almost any woman". It is available for instant access for a limited time at http://www.dating-secrets2.com/